Unbound

I know I haven't really written much on here lately, but like I said, I am trying not to think too much about my future right now and just be in the present. (Easier said than done!) However, that doesn't change the fact that sometimes discernment comes into conversation or things just come up that I need to deal with.

This was one of those times.

This past weekend, I went to Steubenville to attend the Festival of Praise, and then I had a household adviser meeting on Sunday night. After the FOP, I decided it would probably be a good idea to get prayed over since I haven't been in a while. I asked the prayer team to pray for my vocation, that I may know His will, and for my heart. I received much consolation and love from Him throughout the prayer. Not consolation for anything specific, but they kept emphasizing love and how everything is about love. They tried to explain how much love they felt from the Lord for me, but couldn't even put it into words. This was a beautiful gift and gives me strength for the journey. Afterwards, I was still in the chapel praying and decided to go ask the Sister who helps with prayer teams to keep me in her prayers. Of course, being awesome, she asked if I would like to pray with her right then and I eagerly complied. I just started telling her of all the lies I was being faced with, all the past hurts from "men" in my life, what they did to me, and how it was still effecting me. She asked if I had heard of "unbound" prayer (based on Neal Lozano's  book) and I am actually in the midst of reading that right now as per Sr. Della Marie's suggestion. I had even been looking for someone who knows how to pray that to pray it with me. (Providential!) We went to work for an hour through a process of repentance, forgiveness, renouncing lies, taking authority in Jesus' name, and praying the Father's blessing over my life. It took so long because as soon as we would get through one series of lies, another layer would come to the surface that needed to be addressed. It was exhausting. But good. I learned many tools that I can use in my day-to-day life when these lies arise. This wasn't an automatic healing process, but it was a step of shedding light on the darkness in my life, and ridding the enemy of his influence. I definitely still need to be watchful as I am in this vulnerable time, but I know how to better fight these things. I also know now of what specific lies and 'spirits' tend to sneak into my subconscious so I can attack them at their roots.

I feel like I could go into greater detail about these things, but I don't know if the blog is the best place for that....also I am starting to fall asleep as I write this. I haven't made it to mass this week because it has been SO freezing and snowy in the mornings and my sleep schedule has been a little off. Praying for a better disciplined next week!